To countrymen townies are either chavs or wealthy middleclass folk from big cities and suburbs who relocate to the country in search of more space to pursue their townie life-style. Townies know next to nothing about the country and generally don't attempt to adapt to country ways or acquire a country ethos. They inhabit only large houses - old rectories, farm houses, barn conversions and follies - and have at least one 4WD.
They surround their house with a stout fence, Leylandii hedge and something approaching street lighting as they can't bear the impenetrable darkness or the night sky.
They often tire very quickly of the countryside with its noise, mud, smells, unruly vegetation and poor ameneties and relocate to a country market town, or return to the city whence they came.
The main event of the year for a townie living in the countryside is the mid-summer party for which he erects a huge tent, brings in a band which blares out noisy thumpy music all night long to the consternation of wildlife and humans in a radius of 5 miles or so, and which is punctuated by the midnight fireworks display by which means he hopes to establish a pre-eminent social position/pretensions.
The damned townies are buying up all the good property and we locals aren't getting a look in.
One townie to another 'what did you think of the fireworks tonight?''Great, but you should get my sort of rocket. Costs more but goes higher' (Unspoken: next time earn a city bonus like mine and you'll be able to afford them)
dodane przez John Woodland listopad 23, 2005
The old word for chav which, frankly, sounds a lot better and less self-consciously constructed to sound obnoxious by a group of journalists on a slow July nesday.
"Oh great, another pack of townies coming to kick my head in because I don't conform to their world view."
dodane przez OD Smith marzec 18, 2005
Pathetic, overgrown, monkey-brained wanabees. Tend to hang around Mcdonalds or such-like where they smoke dope (or such like). Only dope they'll come close to is each other.
Went into Mcdonalds last week...

Townie: Oi, they don't allow dogs in there.

Me: Yeah, that's why your out here!

I walked away before they realised what I had said and unleashed their fag-breath.
dodane przez Dazza luty 13, 2005
townies also hate grebs, grungers, and basicaly any one who is not a townie.
townies do not understand much even though they think they do.
they also try to act hard infront of friends, especialy ones of the opposite sex (boys try to impress girls and vise verse).
male townie "ye im so ard nd tha', no one is eva gunna botha me"
female townie automaticaly respects them as they are quite gulible
dodane przez abi styczeń 26, 2005
A townie is a cacka who thinks he/she is 'in' they say completely made-up words like
'mush', 'innit' and 'bruv'
they are often incredibly un-intelligent and wear fake burberry or cheap sports jackets and caps. They also tend to wear these caps at almost vertical angles on their heads.

Townies are also often completely deaf:
(a townie is walking along in his 'crew' and a group of skaters walk past)
Skater1:(shouts) Townie!!
Townie1: Wha' d'ya call me??
Skater2: He called you a townie duh
Townie2: Wha' d'ya call i'm?
dodane przez Townie Hater grudzień 21, 2004
There are many definitions and they basically all say the same thing,mine will probably say exactly the same,but here it is...
MALE TOWNIE -
Head - Baseball cap,these are becoming more and more ridiculouslsy sized and coloured!
Hair...will not be any more that 2mm long,
Ears - Usually some type of metal around the ear.
Eyes - looking around for trouble...proabably intoxicated by something cheap,or stolen
Mouth - S**t,f**k,ya mum,stupid made up words that nobody understands but, if one townie says it...another one says it and before you know it we are all breadbins!
Moving down the body to the neck - cheap..fake..pieces of foil covered chocolate stuck together to make some "bling" or something they picked up from "da'n da markii'"
The hoody would most probably fit atleast 5 townies into one, this will be over the head...even if the baseball cap is on! and if everyone else has their tops off because it is the middle of august.
Tracksuit bottoms, in a whole range of colours, the trousers may never ever go past the top of their trainers, otherwise they suddenly become a grunger
The socks will be either from "da'n da markii'" or from a cheap clothes shop that their mum shops in.
Trainers,full stop! if they are not (apparently) more than £100 they will not be seen dead in them
All clothing will be bougth from "da'n da markii'" or stolen and given to them by their dad that never sees them or their older brother (was probably a townie)

The female townie...basic really act like a s**g,sound like....well, thats a difficult one to describe...lets just say, if they want to say something...it will be loud and be some form of cockney or extreme-commoness ,the earings...big enough for dolphins to jump through and look heavy about the smae clothing as the male townie

listens to a sad pathetic excuse for music

usually drinking 24/7 cheap cider that they illegally bought in the off license because they say they are 18 when they are really 13

think they can insult everybody, from every race, culture, abilities, success, individuality, etc

think you are looking at them all the time, and use this as an excuse to have a fight

will have missed most of their secondary education and have never even heard of further education,GCSE's are a waste of their precious hanging around on corner time.

will either end up flipping burgers or in prison. females...pregnant before they learn to spell contraception.
what do you say to a townie in a suit....

Will the defendant please stand
dodane przez monkeygal wrzesień 02, 2004
someone who wears fake designer sports labels, fake burberry or mackenzie hoodies (cuz it looks like its got graffiti on it), caps with the peak at the same angle as everyone else, wear fake gold bling and steal chocolate milkshakes from the local corner shop. knows about 10 words including 'innit' and 'orrite' so communication is tricky. if male, he likes to ride a bike designed for a child 10 years younger than him, with added trick bars which he never uses. If a girl, she will wear lots of cheap burberry perfume and makeup and hair that has been gelled or sprayed back, and will have HUGE fake gold earrings. Townies are not to be confused with wankstas, who are people who try to act like gangstas and listen to 2pac and 50 cent.
Townie: 'orrite bruv, i just jacked some chocola' milkshake from dat corner shop innit, da geeza is gonna be well miffed now, dat is the fif' milkshake i jacked this week innit.'
Townie: 'innit bruv, im gonna go rape sum fuckin 5 year old, la'ers.'
dodane przez wasabi lipiec 14, 2004

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